Anime Weekly – Spring 6: Mahouka becoming more like SAO

In week 6, we witness a lot of intense action in both Mahouka and Black Bullet. No Game No Life also dishes out the weapons of mass distraction as they find a genius way to circumvent Japan’s censorship laws. Double Sidonia next week.

Mahouka 7: Oniisama is overpowered Kirito with magic

Overpowered protagonist be like: Meh, Cast Jamming not gunna work on me bitches!
Overpowered protagonist be like: Meh, Cast Jamming not gunna work on me bitches!

Episode 7 of Mahouka is an intense action episode, where wizards fend off bullets with energy shields, cut weapons and limbs with magically sharpened blades, and freeze people to near-death with Crystal Maiden’s “Freezing Field” ultimate. It’s great and all, especially with the badass Oniisama doing 90 percent of the work without breaking a sweat and without needing to change facial expressions. Seriously, he’s like Kristen Stewart.

Talk about invincibility, huh?

Students from Hogwarts bring the fight to Blanche, the terrorist organization. Four storm in, three are left on the sidelines. Yeah, because fuck them side characters.

Discount Freezing Field.
Discount Freezing Field.

Experience Oniisama’s enhanced Robocop Visor Simulator 2014 (which is basically a Map Hack and Wall Hack) twice in this episode, as he uses it pinpoint exact locations of his enemies… only to barge in and go all Rambo. Seriously, no strategy whatsoever?

Then, witness one of anime’s lamest villains since Sugou or Fairy King Oberon from SAO, as he explains important plot details with a swagger but cries like a bitch when Cast Jamming doesn’t work on our impervious Super Oniisama. And also like Sugou, he gets his arm chopped off. Oooh, finally some blood in this anime. It’s not even blacked out too! Oh, and there’s the “bad guys shoot like Stormtroopers” trope again.

Bad guys with automatic rifles suck.
Bad guys with automatic rifles suck.
Finally, some blood!
Finally, some blood!

After that intense battle at terrorist headquarters, all is well. Mibu-senpai has recovered and is dating Kirihara… right after a swift monologue dedicated to further glorification of Super Oniisama’s strength and valor. Urgh…

And after six episodes, the next episode promises a title card change. Are we all done with “Enrollment”? Good! But before that, let’s get a good look at the upcoming super-villain’s gorgeous bishounen abs in the shower which is just there so fujoshis can squeal even more… Wait, this isn’t Free!

Abbsss...
Abbsss…

So there you have it. Mahouka is now officially a SAO rip-off, only with magic and better story. I’m thinking of dropping this anime if I have to endure like 20 more episodes of the bullshit, but hey, I always need an anime to make fun of every season and Mahouka fits the bill.

No Game No Life 6: Gabriel is hot!

Welcome to the world of No Game No Life, where busty angels get turned on by a collection of e-books on a knock-off iPad. Seriously, this episode is hilarious. It also sparked quite a debate on an Indonesian forum, mainly because it depicted the angel Gabriel as a skank. I know, people right?

Anyway, Gabriel wagers herself and everything she owns in turn for the sibling’s iPad. And commence one of the most epic games in anime history: Materialization Word Chain!

Jibril is the Arabic spelling. I'd stick to Gabriel.
Jibril is the Arabic spelling. I’d stick to Gabriel.
iPad fetish.
iPad fetish.
ngnl-20
There, NEET win right there.
Another NEET pick up line.
Another NEET pick up line.

Rules are the same like normal Word Chain, except: if you say something that exists, it becomes non-existent and vice versa. You need to kill your opponent or make them unable to continue. After the game, everything reverts to normal. And let the games begin!

Right off the bat, Sora (Shiro? Man it’s been 6 episodes and I still can’t tell which is which) summons a hydrogen bomb. He literally starts everything with a bang!

Oh right, Japanese vengeance and what-not.
Oh right, Japanese vengeance and what-not.

And here’s the fans service episode everyone was waiting for. They found a loophole in the censorship laws, too! As long as they don’t show visible nipples or nether regions, they don’t have to censor it! So enjoy “safe” 18+ fap material gentlemen! Beewwbbss…

They did it! They found a loophole!
They did it! They found a loophole!
They... they... managed to break the barrier!
They… they… managed to break the barrier!
PLAYED. OUT. MEME.
PLAYED. OUT. MEME.

Of course, the moral message of this episode is that no matter how much knowledge you may have, if you can’t apply it in the real world (read: games), your knowledge is naught. Gabriel is then smitten and pledges her life to the Blanks. Congratulations, you now have a God-killing weapon on the party!

Black Bullet 6: Loli machine gun! Also, Enju… dead? NOOOOOOO!!

Black Bullet get pretty fast-paced in this action episode and pretty dramatic near the end.

Feeding a loli is like doing charity.
Feeding a loli is like doing charity.

Anyway, Seitenshi has finally come to terms that someone out there is trying to kill her. Along with Rentarou and Enju, they decide to confront the possible mastermind behind the assassination attempt.

But that’s boring.

Tina Sprout gets an order to kill Kisara and she does so in the manliest way possible: BY BRINGING A FUCKING MINIGUN AND RAINING SHIT ON KISARA! Hell yeah! Tina must have terrible aim, or Kisara must be too fast because in the end, they end up in a melee. Kisara almost gets choked to death when she shouts “Rentarou save me!” and a Rentarou-Ex-Machina occurs.

LOLI WITH A MINIGUN!!
LOLI WITH A MINIGUN!!
Rentarou-Ex-Machina.
Rentarou-Ex-Machina.
Tsundere boss is tsundere.
Tsundere boss is tsundere.
We all know what this is.
We all know what this is.

Kisara is hospitalized and Rentarou and Enju are hot on Tina’s trail. The only way to lure her out? Seitenshi has to come into the open. And once again, Tina fails to kill Seitenshi. Just after Enju leaves to confront Tina, Seitenshi discloses an important piece of information.

Tina is not just a loli, she’s also ranked 97 and one of the mechanized soldiers like Kagetane! Plot twist indeed. And… is Enju dead? Please tell me this is a joke. This isn’t Game of Thrones right? Right? Enju… don’t die on me dammit!

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